Becoming a Happy Camper

Camping per se means that you left the comforts of home and embarked on a journey. So many people meander through life without ever leaving their comfort zones. Although death is tragic, there’s nothing more heartbreaking than being alive and not living. Note to self: Magic does not happen in a comfort zone, it happens beyond its borders.

It is an old cliche, life is a journey and if you want to experience the magic of truly living you’ll have to leave your comfort zone and wander bravely into the unknown. In order for your journey to have purpose and a realistic chance of success you’ll need a good and proper base camp.

The Oxford Dictionary defines a base camp as ‘a camp from where people start their journey when climbing high mountains.’ Another (wikipedia) definition specifically refers to a base camp as ‘a place of preparation’. I like both definitions. The first implies that a base camp is required when chasing lofty goals while the other suggests that a base camp is where you prepare yourself before setting off for the summit (your goal).

It’s therefore clear that your base camp needs to be well stocked with whatever provisions, tools and equipment you’ll need on your journey to the summit. It should be a place where you’ll receive nurture and rest before tackling your objective. It should provide you with shelter while waiting for the perfect opportunity to push for the summit. It should be a place where you receive encouragement and advice from people sharing the same values and goals.

Your base camp should be inhabited by the right people. Pick the wrong people to man your camp – negative personalities – and you’re setting yourself up for judgement and criticism that will most probably deflate your spirit and derail your progress. It is of crucial importance to pick the people you confide in wisely. In other words, the strength of your base camp community will ultimately determine your success.

They say that you’re the average of the five people with whom you spend the most time. Take control of your inner circle and if necessary upgrade. Actively seek out positive and inspirational people and spend time with them. Seek their counsel and advice. Look for those who share your values and values your dreams.

If you are currently surrounded by people who drag you down, who constantly questions your actions and bombards you with criticism born out of jealousy, its time for some tough decisions. These decisions will be even tougher if these nay-sayers are the ones closest to you. Excising them completely from your life might not be an option or even possible but you can choose what you share with them. You can de-escalate the intimacy of the relationship. You can deny them space in your head by carefully choosing what you share and what you don’t share with them. Sounds selfish? Self-respecting people won’t tolerate negative relationships and neither should you. Maintaining such relationships might be sign of poor self-esteem. You might think that you don’t deserve better relationships. Discard that limiting believe. You owe it to yourself to surround you with people that inspires you, that elevates you and most importantly that believes in you.

Banish the negative, pessimistic personalities from your base camp. Time spent with them is time wasted. It is that simple. Making it into base camp already shows that you’ve committed yourself to a hero’s journey. It is time to stop being the supporting actor and act like the hero.

Another thought about the people in your base camp is this: The overall health (or strength) of the camp depends on the health of the individuals and the health of the individuals depends on the health of the camp. Successful mountaineers know that they must spend as much time, if not more, in tending to their base camp as they do on actually climbing mountains. Devoting too much time on reaching summits will lead to the deterioration of the base camp. That’s why a man constantly climbing the corporate ladder might return one day to find his house in shambles and his spouse gone. The other side of the coin also holds true. The wife thinking that just being in base camp is her summit cannot understand or empathise with her husband’s need for achievement and reacts to them with jealousy and never-ending demands that he must devote more of his energy to the home. Sooner or later the husband will suffocate and flee the camp.

The ideal is then for a community or relationship to exist for the primary purpose of nurturing each of the individual participants for their individual journeys towards their own goals. Genuine love not only respects the individuality of the other but actually seeks to cultivate it, even at the risk of separation or loss. The ultimate goal (in life) remains the (spiritual) growth of the individual, the solitary journey to peaks that can only be climbed alone – for it is the sacrifices made on behalf of the growth of the other that result in the the equal or even greater growth of the self. It is the return of the individual from the peaks he or she has traveled to alone which serves to elevate the base camp community (or the relationship). In this way individual growth and that of the people you surround yourself with are interdependent, but it is always and inevitably lonely out on the (summit) growing edge…

Getting your base camp right (well stocked and manned by people that inspires you) will not only launch you onto those growing edges but it will make the return from those edges the highlight of your journey. Similarly, so will the summits reached by those around you fill you with the same gratitude and purpose as the summits you conquered yourself.

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